Short Short Essay Reflection

After reviewing my essay on the short story “Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been?” I now realize my main problem: my thesis needs to be worked on.  When I write papers, my biggest problem is the thesis since I never know how to phrase what I want to say and include the product of every one of my points that I am going to make throughout my paper in one sentence.  I feel that the thesis sentence of a paper is my achilles heel since that is the major problem I face.  Most of the points made throughout the paper are the facts that I have not linked many things back to my thesis.  What I feel that I should start doing is think of a temporary thesis to create my paper then go back and redo my thesis to fit the work as a whole.  If I start drilling myself on doing this then I feel as if I will be a much more strong and confident writer.  

Another problem I found was that I claimed throughout my paper that Connie is innocent yet I never provide any backup to this claim.  Many notes throughout the paper are that I am claiming that Connie has innocence when I have not yet shown the reader that she is innocent and backed it up with evidence.  If I had made a paragraph asserting Connie’s innocence, then all of my points would have been valid however since I provided no proof, then I seemed to be merely speculating rather than justifying.  By continuously inferring that Connie began with innocence, I weakened my argument because I was then shown to be inferring rather than truly knowing and enforcing the facts and supporting them with claims.

My last main problem seemed to be my “So What?” statement.  This problem actually leads back to my first problem of writing the thesis.  If my thesis covered the main idea of my paper, then my so what statements would have been much more defined and clear.  This proves that many of the key points in a paper create a domino effect.  For instance, if there is not a strong enough thesis, then the back-up points will not fit into the so what statements, which means the argument will then be either weak or invalid.  This fine balance of essay components will then help me move toward getting a higher grade on the next paper that I write.  I feel as though if I focus on meshing these components together into a simple yet strong set of claims, datas and warrants then I will become a much stronger AP writer.

After reading through my paper again and analyzing all of the comments made, I believe that I now understand my main weak points when it comes to writing college-level essays.  Though I am happy with my grade, I am always looking to improve myself and now feel as though I know what to work on a practice in order to receive a higher grade on the next essay.

Willie: The Mirror Image of Mason City’s Society

Last week, we had our first discussion about All The King's Men.  This discussion kept me thinking about the role of Society v. The Individual.  Luckily, I will be looking for it throughout the entire novel and will be able to look at this theme with greater understanding each coming week.  Nonetheless, the first reading assignment (chapters one and two) truly opened my eyes to the role of the individual in Mason City.  My favorite quotation throughout the novel so far is, “the beer came, and the bottle of pop” (25).  Out of context this quotation obviously has no significant meaning to life, but when it is read with the rest of the passage, the realization hits that the beer and bottle of pop are metaphors.  When Willie is out with some men, he decides to order a bottle of pop rather than the beer that everyone else is ordering; he is pressured into ordering the beer yet still sticks to his bottle of pop.  When the drinks are served, it is quite easy to tell who is the black sheep of the group since the pop stands out from the beer.  This scene takes place before Willie had come to power; when he was young, naïve and hopeful.

The same lesson takes part in his decision for Willie’s participation in the election.  He describes what he feels is important in his speeches, yet barely dents the election.  However, later on he conforms to the people and only tells  them what they want to hear rather than what he feels is important and gets higher in the election.  None of the people of Mason City cared about him before he conformed to their beliefs, yet now they fawn over him because he caters to what they want rather than what he feels is necessary to talk about.

A quote from chapter three describes exactly what Willie turns into when it is described that, “if there weren’t any people there wouldn’t be any you because what you do, which is what you are, only has meaning in relation to other people” (184).  I believe this describes Willie to a tee since he started out as an individual who created himself, but as he became more and more corrupted he slowly became a person created by society.  He is no longer himself; he is just a mirror image of the people.  Now, if the people disappear, he will no longer be himself and will lose the person who was created by society.  He now lives for the elections, speeches and pretty much the people of Mason City; everything he does is for one of the three.  Without Mason City, Willie no longer exists because Willie is no longer himself; he is now Mason City’s society’s creation.

He began as a nice man who was the black sheep of the town and now we see him as the corrupted part of society that Mason City turned him into; this sad truth will be the reason for Willie’s demise.

Why Cinderella Makes Me Angry...

After reading “Cinderella” through different lenses in class the other day, I realized how sexist it actually is.  Upon my completion of the short story, I saw it through an AP Literature point of view and after that I suddenly understood why we were reading it in our college-level class.  I had always believed the story of “Cinderella” was a magical and wonderful tale of a woman transitioning from a helpless, terrible life into a dream-come-true.  Though this is true, I had not realized how much the author pushes the work of the man (the prince) and the lack of work from the woman (Cinderella).

First of all, Cinderella does absolutely nothing throughout the fairy tale; I mean, I understand that she has been living a hard life for many years, but all she has to do is make a wish and a fairy godmother swoops in and saves the day by waving her wand and sending her to the ball in a fancy carriage.  What does Cinderella do whilst all of this is happening?  She stands there, watches, then complains that she is still in dirty rags.  The godmother then changes her clothes while Cinderella once again does absolutely nothing.

When Cinderella arrives at the ball, the prince falls in love with her beauty; not her charm or intelligence.  As far as we know, she could have absolutely have no personality, yet she is a pretty girl and therefore wins the heart of the prince.  By this point in the story, any reader with common sense would be able to make the assumption that it is a man who wrote this due to the fact that he claims Cinderella to get all of these amazing things, yet she does nothing to get them but make a simple wish.

When Cinderella loses a shoe, the prince picks it up and tries it on every girl in the town to find the perfect match.  This is yet another problem with a man writing a fairytale; he portrays the man to be the one working at the relationship rather than both of them equally putting in effort.  Throughout all of the scenes, Cinderella is never portrayed as intelligent or funny or an all-around good-natured girl; she is objectified as a stunningly beautiful woman.  The objectivity in this tale is very extreme since the reader never truly understands who Cinderella is.  To us, she is merely a pretty girl who is sent to the ball by a magical godmother.  We never learn her personality.

Back when I was younger I thought this was an amazing story but now I understand it for what it is: a man’s ego written into a story.  The author obviously feels as if men do everything and all the girls have to do to get a “happily ever after” is to sit around and wait for their men to do all of the work; this is not a true reality.  As a girl who was once inspired by this tale, I am truly crushed to learn the realities of this sexist story.

The Bible Through Sade's Eyes

On Thursday, I saw “Marat/Sade,” a play about “the persecution and assassination of Jean-Paul Marat as performed by the inmates of the asylum of Charenton under the direction of the Marquis de Sade.”  This play is absolutely insane (much like the characters in it), but I believe it to have a much deeper meaning than a murder acted out by mental patients.

During intermission, all of the AP Literature students collaborated together to try and figure out the hidden meanings of the play--after all, we are AP Literature students!  The general consensus was that the play is a allusion to The Bible.  While there may be many different interpretations, this is the one I find the most believable.

The character of Marat is closely associated to Jesus.  He leads the patients to find strength inside themselves and risks everything in his life in order to tell the patients what they need to know: they can be free if they revolt.  In the end of the play (caution, a spoiler alert is coming) the patient who is playing Marat is murdered in his hydrotherapy tub in front of the crowd of followers, much like Marat is murdered in his bathtub; this scene is the reason for the revolt.  The murder is an allusion to the crucifixion of Jesus on the cross.  A cross is typically thought of as a symbol of Jesus, much like the bathtub is a symbol of Marat.

A small allusion that I almost did not catch in the beginning adds fire to the flame of the argument of Marat being Jesus; a crown of leaves is placed upon his head, much like the crown of thorns on Jesus’s head.  The act of placing the crown on the head of Jesus happened before Jesus died on the cross, and the crown of leaves was placed on Marat’s head before the play-inside-the-play began.  This act is foreshadowing of the death of a leader, and at the end of the play, the murder ensues.  Though I did not notice the importance of the crown at first, I now understand it to be one of the most important symbols of the play.  This is the foreshadowing of an on-coming death of a leader and it is the most direct link that connects Marat to Jesus.

A strange happening that took place during this place was when Sade made leading lady Charlotte Corday whip him repeatedly.  This act is very closely related to religious allusions.  I believe the whipping is the cleansing of Sade’s soul since he is confessing all of his sins.  The fact that he made Corday beat him is still confusing to me; I have thought of it from many different angles but I still wonder why he chose the poor girl who was nervous and scared of committing the act.  I was not able to go to the morning discussion, however I do feel that there should be a discussion that takes place  discussing why Corday was chosen to beat Sade and the importance of the beating to the play.